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Revenge of the Bed, Pt. 2

When last we checked in with April and Jonny’s bed, it had been mobilized by Mars in Cancer into a particularly savage display of aggression. Today, a new and apparently fatal development in the battle of the bed: Jonny perched on the edge of the mattress this morning to don his socks, and the bed’s frame gave way in a characteristically dramatic (SNAP!) (CRASH!) – and apparently irreparable – fashion.

That’s it. This bed is a toxic mixture of weakness and vengeance, and it must be replaced.

The irony is this. Today I was scheduled to participate in an experiment my friend Simone is conducting, exploring the intersection of astrology and feng shui. Her theory is that one might note the house of the horoscope where the New Moon falls, and perform a ritual to strengthen the Gua of one’s home that fits the symbolism of the astrological house. Today’s New Moon (at 11.32 Cancer) falls in my 8th house, the house of shared resources – a house of wealth, so my assignment was to perform a ritual in the wealth Gua of our home. Which is – you guessed it – the master bedroom.

I’m not sure breaking the bed is what the Gods had in mind. But this will certainly have an impact on our shared resources; replacing this bed won’t be cheap.


Where does today’s New Moon fall in your chart? Consider strengthening the relevant area of your house as part of your New Moon observances (New Moon exact tonight at 10:19 pm EDT). From the perspective of your home’s front entrance, superimpose the bagua onto the rooms of the house.

Simone suggests the following correlations between the houses of the horoscope and your home’s bagua:

First House: Career
Second & Eighth Houses: Wealth
Third & Ninth Houses: Knowledge
Fourth House: Family
Fifth House: Creativity & Children
Sixth & Twelfth Houses: Health
Seventh House: Love & Partnership
Tenth House: Fame
Eleventh House: Helpful People

Report back in comments, and I’ll pass on your results to Simone!

7 comments to " Revenge of the Bed, Pt. 2 "

  • Eme

    First house. I’m Cancer rising.

  • Hi April – Wow, sorry to hear about the spectacular crash of your bed. I am glad neither you nor Jonny were badly injured in this latest chapter of the Batman-like (BiFF! Pow!) bed. I hear Jerome’s is having a sale! Just kidding…I haven’t really heard that….but aren’t they usually having one? Esp. over 4th of July weekend maybe you could get a good deal on a new frame. Or you could live frame-less for a while; box spring and mattress on floor is so, well, bohemian. But probably not good feng shui. Alas.

    In my New Moon news, I have dutifully performed my 7th house partnership ritual and await results to report :-). So far I do notice I was much less inclined to strangle or throttle my coworkers, so I’m taking that as a good start.

  • That would be my helpful people gua, front right.

  • The new moon fell in my 9th house, and sure enough, as I told you in email a minute ago, I had a legal contract issue hit. I’m on the bandwagon a little late for the bagua ritual, but I do happen to have a series of bookcases filled with fiction and nonfiction books in that Knowledge bagua. Or at least bookcases that are about to be filled with books once they’re unpacked. Oy! Maybe I should do something there first thing.

  • I’m in the Knowledge sector, too. A surprise visit from the inspector general has led to a total reorganization of “everything” (except the single spot holding the overflow from everywhere else). But, this does sound like a good time to reorganize the library. (Maybe I should look at school again. Hmm.)

  • Thought I would follow up. Finished a graduate degree since that entry four years ago. 🙂 (I guess I did “look at school again.”)

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